Level Below
by Shelby McQueen
Summary: Something's wrong with the remaining barriers. Dark Kamui seeks out the new Sakurazukamori's assistance in order to find out what's going on /full summary inside/. AU, partially romance. Seishirou/Subaru, Fuuma/Subaru.
1. Chapter 1

**_Disclaimer:_** I don't own anything, hearts and souls, and characters belong to CLAMP. And this story belongs to my real-life Subaru-kun (**itildin** on LJ), I've just translated it to English.

_**Summary:** _Something is wrong with the remaining barriers, as Dark Kamui cannot break down the last ones. He seeks out the new Sakurazukamori's assistance in order to find out what's going on, and together they come across something very... interesting. Seishirou, as always, knows everything, but for that one to say something clearly? - Please. AU, angst, mystery, partially romance. Seishirou/Subaru, Fuuma/Subaru.

Reviews are appreciated dearly. :)

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><p><strong><em><strong><em><strong><em><strong>Level Below<br>**_**_**_**

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><p>"I'm going to destroy the last barrier."<p>

"…"

"And kill Kamui."

"…"

"…and the rest of the mankind too. Seriously, you don't care _that _much?" – Fuuma, or, more precisely, Dark Kamui, suspiciously glanced at Subaru. – "During our first meeting, as I recall, you were behaving differently."

"It was long time ago. People change," – one green and one brown eye, black clothes… it seemed Subaru isn't even present here at all. – "Did you call me here just to tell me all of this?"

They were sitting at the table by the window, in one of the few remaining cafes in Tokyo. Subaru didn't even touch his coffee, and white steam above the cup was giving off bitter cinnamon scent.

"You don't like your coffee?" – Fuuma asked skeptically.

"It doesn't matter."

"Hm, if that's the case, you won't mind helping me out a bit, will you?" – mischievous smirk appeared on Fuuma's face, but Subaru, drawn in his own gloomy thoughts, never noticed. Too bad for him. – "Let's go," – the man pulled the former white onmyouji towards the exit.

Subaru didn't resist.

It was raining lightly outside. The street was wrapped in fog and blurry twilight of early evening.

"What are you doing?" – Subaru felt as if he's waking up from a deep sleep, when he suddenly found himself pressed over the wet wall in the back alley.

"Well, since you don't care what's happening to you," – Fuuma jerked Subaru's head up, holding him by his chin, and drew a line across the onmyouji's cheek with his finger. – "I figured you wouldn't mind helping me carry out a little, lets say, ritual."

"What kind of ritual is that?" – as an onmyouji Subaru knew everything about magical rituals. Well, practically everything. And none of them was beginning with somebody touching you in such a suggestive manner.

"Actually, I was counting on Seishirou's help with the destruction of the last barrier," – Fuuma's smile gained somewhat self-satisfied and anticipating expression. – "But since his power now belongs to you, you'll have to share it," – he touched clasps on Subaru's coat, beginning to unbutton it.

"You mean you want to… with me…?" – Subaru couldn't say it out loud for some reason. – "You mean… right here?"

"You don't care anyway, do you now?" – Fuuma smiled carelessly, continuing to unbutton Subaru's coat, and threw it to the ground.

Warm breath over his skin, palms on his shoulders, persistently pressing him against the wall… Subaru could stand it for exactly ten seconds.

"I won't even ask which onmyoujitsu, dark or white, did you use," – Fuuma remarked, eyeing his broken sunglasses with grief.

"Because there are no such rituals," – Subaru whispered, and blushed unexpectedly.

"Of course there aren't," – Fuuma nodded in agreement, and continued with satisfaction in his voice. – "Which means you _do_ care, after all."

"I… I just…"

"Enough of excuses. People might change, but not you," – Fuuma picked Subaru's coat up, and with sudden gentleness wrapped it around onmyouji's shoulders. – "Lets go back inside. Maybe they still haven't cleaned our table."


	2. Chapter 2

**_Disclaimer:_** I don't own anything, hearts and souls, and characters belong to CLAMP. And this story belongs to my real-life Subaru-kun (**itildin** on LJ), I've just translated it to English.

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><p>If asked, Subaru probably wouldn't know the answer to why did he return to his former apartment. The setting sun was coloring room in pale shades of gold, throwing shadows over the walls. Everything here seemed both usual, yet somehow strange.<p>

The past few months Subaru spent at Seishirou Sakurazuka's house. His former house, that is. Crimson blood-like camellias and eternally blooming sakura trees. Subaru didn't seem to care or notice what's going on around him anymore.

Yet this time something was different about his apartment. After a few moments Subaru realized, what exactly – the green light was flickering on his answering machine, signalizing he had some messages.

The onmyouji's surprise was too faint to even pay attention to the feeling. Subaru mechanically reached out with his hand and pressed the play button.

Fuuma's mocking voice felt completely out of place in the empty room.

"I knew you'd come here today," – the teenager said triumphantly. – "Lets call it intuition. Although I just know your wishes," – Fuuma seemed to be distracted by something. Somebody's coughing and sounds of distant voices were pointing out that he was at a public place. – "Anyway, since you already got this message, then, when you're free, come to the cafe. Oh yeah, and take your magical trinkets with you. You got a job."

Magical trinkets?

Cafe?

Subaru quickly realized though, which cafe Fuuma meant. He felt the strange mix of mild agitation and deep sadness. He was mad at himself, and sad because…

"Seishirou-san…" – he closed his right eye with his palm – gesture, that was turning into a habit of his.

"_Okay, I get it, which cafe. But the job. What kind of job?" – _Subaru was pulling his shirt collar thoughtfully. An old habit he failed to get rid of through all these years.

The decision had to be made, and after brief contemplation Subaru reached out to grab his ofuda. The cards lay in his palm, and for a moment the onmyouji felt as if he's back in his sixteen, when his work was taking the major part in his life, and he didn't have to think about things that were more serious or frightening. Those times had passed away forever with no return.

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><p>Noise and crowd inside the cafe were deafening, and Subaru felt confused. So many people.<p>

"_Seems it's a day off today,"_ – he mused, glancing around him with insecurity. His inability to orientate in unknown places or situations sometimes was getting onto his nerves.

"Hey, I'm here," – somebody yanked him by his shoulder familiarly, and turned around. – "Are you planning to stand there looking dumb for how much longer?"

"Oh… I haven't noticed you," – Subaru began to apologize more out of politeness, than honesty. – "So what is that job you were talking about?" – he sat on the chair Fuuma offered to him hesitantly. He didn't like this place.

"Won't you eat something first?" – Fuuma wondered, ignoring Subaru's question. He was clearly enjoying his ice cream dessert.

"You like sweet?" - the onmyouji asked absently, looking at table's surface.

"Actually, yes. But you didn't answer my question," – Fuuma snorted, demonstratively taking a huge bite of his ice cream.

"Neither did you," – Subaru continued to stare at the polished surface of the table. – "Strange choice," – he added after a few moments.

"You're talking about this place?" – Fuuma guessed immediately. – "There are so many people here. So many interesting wishes I can hear around," – he smirked and continued to eat his dessert. – "Well, since you aren't hungry, let's get down to business."

Subaru nodded faintly, showing that he's ready to listen. He felt some strange twitching in his right eye and couldn't figure out the reason.

"Interesting things are happening in Tokyo nowadays," – Fuuma remarked, obviously thinking about something off the topic. – "Anyway, about the job. I've decided earlier today to carry out my own obligations."

"You mean destroying the barriers," – Subaru sighed, touching the ofuda in his pocket.

"Something like that," – Fuuma smiled cheerfully, and then suddenly continued in a serious tone. – "But nothing happened. I couldn't do it."

"What?" – this time Subaru felt honest astonishment and disbelief. For the first time in many, many days.

"Imagine my surprise," – Fuuma twirled his hand carelessly, but then turned serious again. – "It was as if something was getting in my way. Or someone. I do not understand."

"Is that even possible?" – Subaru pulled his collar again, thinking.

"It appears that it is. I'd like for you to check if there are some traces there… well, of something. Like things you've been dealing with as an onmyouji. Spells, vengeful ghosts, whatever else you have in there."

"I… alright, I'll try to check it out," – Subaru got up slowly.

"Where are you going now?" – Fuuma appeared right next to him, finishing his ice cream in a hurry. – "Lets go together. I want to look and see it for myself."

Subaru figured there would be no point in arguing.

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><p>The wind was strong at this height, and Subaru fixed his gloves, shivering a little. They were standing at the Tokyo Government building – that one stubborn barrier. It's not as if Subaru cared about the fate of the Earth or barriers anymore. Yet still he caught himself thinking that he's glad that barriers aren't breaking.<p>

"_It's just a job,"_ – he reassured himself, but the feeling of slight relief hasn't disappeared.

"Are you sure you did everything right? I mean… maybe…" – Subaru began to mumble and stutter, just like in his sixteen.

"Of course I did. You think I've suddenly forgotten how to destroy the barriers?" – Fuuma snorted with self-satisfaction, and added impatiently. – "Well?"

Subaru closed his eyes and concentrated, trying to catch a glimpse of anything unusual, any ghostly presence, maybe… but it was as if he dove into some sticky darkness. Empty. Nothing. Not a trace of those usual threads of energy that he saw, when something supernatural was going on.

"Strange… I cannot feel anything," – he frowned.

"_Can it be that Seishirou-san's power overthrew my own?"_

The wind was angrily howling around, and Subaru felt tears in corners of his eyes.

"So, how was it?" – Fuuma looked sincerely curious. Despite all his power as a Twin Star, he didn't know things like the onmyouji did.

"Nothing," – Subaru shook his head and continued hesitantly. – "Maybe… I'll try to check possible spells. I need to make a kekkai," – he reached for the ofuda.

"What for?" – Fuuma asked, looking innocently.

"Because the remnants of spells – if there will be any – might be dangerous," – Subaru explained patiently.

"Are you worried about me?" – it seemed like Fuuma was greatly amused by that assumption. He looked as satisfied as a cat after a nice meal.

Subaru ignored that comment. The ofuda in his hands were trembling on the wind like autumn leaves. They lit up with green light when Subaru set them into the form of a pentagram. When he was finished with setting up the kekkai, the onmyouji pulled Fuuma closer to himself.

"Stay here, please," – he said indifferently, and began to chant a spell. The ofuda glowed brighter, and green light seemed to color Subaru's eyes in same shade.

"I don't understand," – Subaru looked completely confused now. – "Nothing at all."

"But there has to be something that is getting in my way," – Fuuma retorted.

"Whatever it is, I haven't seen anything like that before. Maybe… in some books…" – Subaru began to mumble again.

He didn't tell Fuuma that, for a mere second, he saw strange circles spreading out over the pitch-black water's surface.


	3. Chapter 3

**_Disclaimer:_** I don't own anything, hearts and souls, and characters belong to CLAMP. And this story belongs to my real-life Subaru-kun (**itildin** on LJ), I've just translated it to English.

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><p>The sakura petals were falling around him with gentle rustle. Just like pale pink rain - slowly, gently, with a bewitching grace. There were so many, it seemed one could drown.<p>

"Subaru-kun."

That familiar deceptively soft voice.

"_This means I'm just sleeping in my apartment, and am seeing this dream," – _Subaru sighed mentally.

He couldn't make himself turn around and look at the man who called his name, even in this unreality. It appeared he didn't have to.

"It's been a long time," – Seishirou was now standing right in front of him, as if he materialized out of nowhere.

_"My dreams are devoid of any logic."_

The same different eyes – one blind, one brown with golden shade… the familiar light irony in his gaze. Even the eternally lit cigarette in his hand.

_"And my memory is quite picky too... I don't remember dates, I'm messing up days of week, and I'm missing right turns on the streets, but when it comes down to **him**…"_

Several months ago he'd already attack Seishirou with ofuda. But now Subaru no longer had any wishes or unbearable contradictions with himself. That's why he remained standing still, waiting for what would happen next, even though his heart seemed to turn upside down the very moment he heard Seishirou's voice.

And then it happened.

Thin, lithe and nimble branches suddenly reached out for him, entangling his wrists and pressing him over the tall sakura tree behind.

"…_and my subconsciousness apparently has some masochistic inclinations," _– Subaru moved his hands carefully, trying to break free, but the branches entwined themselves harder against his skin, scratching it.

A moment later Seishirou put his palm on the tree's trunk near Subaru's head, studying his prey with mocking interest.

"You quit smoking," – he stated, throwing the stub of his own cigarette away, sounding mildly surprised.

"Yes. I no longer need that," – Subaru nodded in agreement. He couldn't bring himself to look at the man's face, preferring to stare at his tie and shirt collar instead.

"I've been telling you since long ago, that smoking is bad for your health," – Seishirou reached out with his other hand and took Subaru's wrist, entangled in sakura, turning it around a bit. – "So, how do you like your freedom?" – he nodded towards the back of Subaru's hand, meaning disappeared marks of the Sakurazukamori.

"You know the answer yourself, Seishirou-san."

"Yet still I'd prefer to hear it from you, Subaru-kun," – Seishirou stepped back from the onmyouji and put his hands in his pockets. – "Although right now other things are more important," – his voice subtly changed, sounding darker now. – "The remaining barriers. Seems it's getting interesting."

"How do you know?" – Subaru jerked forward, and branches roughly grabbed him back, disabling his movement.

"I'll give you a hint," – Seishirou smiled, while disappearing in a whirl of sakura petals. – "Oh, by the way… you look really cute with these different eyes of yours."

The man disappeared, and something changed in surroundings.

"_Water? Where does this water come from?"_

The whole place around the sakura suddenly was covered with muddy water. Subaru felt something is pulling him down towards the depths, to the very bottom of it, and before the wakening he suddenly remembered very clearly those strange circles, that he saw at the Tokyo Government building.

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><p>Subaru felt as if he's been violently thrown out of his dream. He clutched at his sheets, gasping, trying to grasp the reality around. His head was dizzy and his throat sore, as if he had really almost drowned in all that dark water. Remembering his dream made him feel a real physical pain, and that crashing depths had nothing to do with it.<p>

Seishirou seemed so real there.

Annoying noise was distracting him from his memories, and Subaru, through the haze, realized that the phone was ringing.

"_So that's what woke me up."_

He reached for the phone, halting for a moment, uncertain whether to answer it or not.

"Yes?" – he took the receiver at last, thinking how hoarse and broken his own voice sounds.

"Enough of lazing under blankets. It's such a splendid weather outside," – Fuuma's voice was so falsely blithesome, that Subaru grimaced in irritation. Still, he glanced through the window. Pale yellow sunbeams of the late autumn were seen through the half-closed shutters.

"_Weather must really be nice," _– he mused absently.

"Did something happen?" – Subaru sat on his bed, trying to shake off the remnants of his dream. He had to remind himself that he is here and now. And Seishirou isn't. Other things didn't matter.

"Not really," – Fuuma answered evasively. – "We're meeting today at eight near the Tokyo Tower," – he hung up.

Subaru stared at the receiver for a few moments, and then he looked at his hands. Dark, painful bruises, that were showing up around his wrists, where the sakura held him in his dream, turned out to be quite real.


	4. Chapter 4

**_Disclaimer:_** I don't own anything, hearts and souls, and characters belong to CLAMP. And this story belongs to my real-life Subaru-kun (**itildin** on LJ), I've just translated it to English.

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><p>Subaru managed to be late only for ten minutes. It was sort of achievement, since it was always hard for him to get on time for the appointment. Before it was usually his work to blame, but now probably just his estrangement and abashment. Besides, the road to the Tokyo Tower now went through heavily damaged and flooded part of the city.<p>

"_So much water,"_ – Subaru stopped in his tracks, looking at the rough, chipped fragments of walls reflected in the mirror-like surface. – _"Just like in my dream," _– he reached out for the reflection thoughtfully, and ripples formed on the water's surface, spreading in circles.

Of course, when Subaru came to the place for appointment, Fuuma was already waiting.

"I'm sorry, I got distracted," – Subaru apologized, trying to hide that he was in hurry.

"I can see that," – Fuuma looked at Subaru with sort of mild mockery, then suddenly picked him under his arm and pulled towards the entrance.

"Wait, what are you doing?" – Subaru carefully freed himself from Fuuma's grip, looking with surprise towards the white-orange spike of the Tokyo Tower, that stood out against the evening sky.

"What do you mean what am I doing? Taking you for a trip to the Tokyo Tower, of course."

"And seriously now?" – Subaru suppressed the sigh. Sometimes Fuuma's manner of speaking made him feel… very mixed emotions.

"If seriously," – Fuuma stopped and put his hands inside his jeans' pockets. – "I want to see if I can take down this barrier," – he lowered his tone, but it sounded loud enough anyway. – "And you'll check if there's something unusual in here. The stuff you're dealing with."

"But… isn't this the barrier that can only be destroyed in the Final Battle?" – Subaru wrinkled his brow, trying to remember what was he told about the Dragons of Heaven and Dragons of Earth in the Sumeragi family.

"Not necessarily. Or should I call Kamui here?" – Fuuma snorted and stepped closer to Subaru. – "Surely, he'll be so happy when he sees you like this."

Subaru turned his gaze aside, feeling guilty. Fuuma pulled the onmyouji towards the Tower again, this time without resistance from Subaru.

"We need to pay an entrance fee," – Subaru started to dig his pockets. – "I'm sure I had some money with me…"

He tried to remember when was the last time he bought something, but couldn't. His fingers stumbled upon piece of plastic, and Subaru pulled it out with mild bewilderment. The credit card of Seishirou Sakurazuka. It appeared that Subaru took it with him from that house.

Subaru paid the fee for both himself and Fuuma, and carefully put the card back into his pocket. He didn't want to use what belonged to Seishirou, especially not like this, and he promised himself it's the first and the last time.

He chose to ignore Fuuma's excited exclamation – "Oh, so it's your treat today?" – but later, remembering what happened a while ago, he slowly said:

"I have broken your sunglasses. Lets consider this as if I paid for them."

"You're so honest."

Inside the Tower Subaru was marveled by the number of people, who came to see the sights of Tokyo from the viewing platforms, or to visit museum situated here as well. To think there would be such a crowd here in such dangerous times, when half of the city now lied in ruins.

"Seishirou-san was right," – Subaru muttered barely audible, but Fuuma heard him nonetheless.

"Right about what?" – they've stopped by the huge aquarium on the first floor. Fishes of different species were sliding through the pale green water in hurry, hiding behind the weeds.

"He said once that Tokyo is the only city on this earth that can enjoy itself as it walks the path towards destruction. Now I can see just how right he was about it," – Subaru, lost in his thoughts, abruptly drew a line across the glass with his finger. A flock of silvery fishes darted away, frightened by a sudden movement.

"That Seishirou of yours," – Fuuma looked somewhere past him. – "Was really such an egoist."

The right eye started to hurt again and Subaru rubbed it.

"_I wonder what's wrong. It seems its sight has worsened too,"_ – he blinked, trying to focus, while they were walking towards the viewing platform.

"Just look at the view from here," – Fuuma enthusiastically looked through telescopes, that were placed around the platform's perimeter.

"Yeah?" – Subaru asked absently, closing his eye with his palm, trying to soothe uncomfortable tingling.

"What's wrong?" – Fuuma let the telescope go and looked at Subaru suspiciously. – "Are your eyes tired?"

"I don't know," – Subaru ran over his face with his hand limply.

"Maybe you should start wearing sunglasses too, huh?" – Fuuma smirked with satisfaction, and suddenly took off his own new sunglasses, placing those at Subaru's face. – "Not this model though," – he concluded after a few moments, studying Subaru meticulously from all sides.

"Why?" – Fuuma's suggestion was so unexpected and absurd that Subaru doubted its reality. – "I've never worn them before."

"You're constantly rubbing your eyes. Sunglasses might help, that's all," – Fuuma's voice sounded deliberately careless.

"Maybe we should get down to business now?" – Subaru sighed. This place… held too many memories.

"You're telling me to try destroying the Tower while it's filled with people? And what if my power works this time? Oh well, you probably don't care anyway," – Fuuma began to raise his hand.

"Stop," – Subaru said distractedly. Of course, people and the fate of the earth itself held no meaning for him anymore, but… but what exactly, Subaru couldn't explain even to himself.

"We'll wait until everybody is gone, and the Tower is closed for visitors," – Fuuma announced in a happy tone. – "I think we should hide somewhere," – he looked around.

"There are premises at the upper floor," – Subaru's voice was so quiet that Fuuma rather guessed than heard what did the onmyouji say.

"How do you know?"

"I've been here before once. During the job," – Subaru added after a moment, and looked away.

Fuuma raised his eyebrows but didn't comment on that one.

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><p>Sitting on the floor in some gloomy room, waiting for the moment when the last visitor will leave, turned out to be quite tedious. Subaru leaned over the wall and closed his eyes. He was sleepy, but he didn't want to see nightmares again. Even though they had Seishirou in them.<p>

Fuuma paced around the room with unusually serious, if not dark look. Subaru watched him walking from corner to corner for a while from beneath his eyelashes, not daring to ask.

"Is something wrong?" – he asked finally.

"What are you talking about?" – Fuuma raised his gaze in surprise, as if being pulled out of some not too pleasant thoughts.

"You have the look as if the Final Battle had already begun," – Subaru shrugged.

"Oh, that," – Fuuma laughed somewhat bitterly. – "You do know Kamui's true wish, right?" – he came over to Subaru, watching the onmyouji from above.

"I guess."

"I wonder, why does is seem to me that both of our wishes do not matter anymore."

"What? Are you serious?" – Subaru's mismatched eyes were looking at him. The onmyouji got up from the floor and was now looking at the teenager with concern. Fuuma stepped forward, and Subaru mechanically pressed his back against the wall, trying to save the distance.

"Seishirou was telling hints about it. But for that one to say something straight…" – Fuuma smirked and raised Subaru's head, holding him by his chin. – "Maybe you know something?"

Water. Lots of water.

"No, nothing," – Subaru shook his head. – "You've been socializing with him more than I have anyway," – his tone sounded unexpectedly bitter.

"Are you sure?" – Fuuma's voice gained threatening notes in it, instead of his usual fake cheerfulness.

Subaru lowered his eyelashes, as a sign of affirmation for his words.

"Alright, have it your way," – Fuuma let him go, looking carefree again, as if nothing happened. – "So, shall we try out this barrier?" – he added, abruptly changing the subject.

"Yes, we can now. It's almost eleven, I think everybody left."

Fuuma concentrated, and Subaru almost physically felt, how powerful Kamui of the Dragons of Earth was. The air thickened inside the room, crossed by the invisible threads of his energy.

…Nothing happened.

Fuuma tried again, this time going with full force out, but result remained the same.

"It seems like this barrier is beyond me as well," – he smirked a bit, looking at Subaru with question in his eyes.

"I cannot feel anything," – the onmyouji said uncertainly. – "I mean, there have always been ghosts here, but none of them is powerful enough to stop you from breaking this barrier."

"_I'll give you a hint."_

"_Seishirou-san, I do not understand."_

"Well, let's get out of here?" – Fuuma looked as carefree as ever, but Subaru caught a glimpse of tension in his voice. Nothing strange, considering the problem they have just faced.

"What the hell," – Fuuma cursed, when he failed to break the lock at the doors that lead away from the floor, even though he used all his force. – "You try?" – he turned to Subaru.

He tried. Unsuccessfully.

"You're the Sakurazukamori," – Fuuma said with indignation. – "And this is just bloody door lock!"

"And you're the Kamui of the Dragons of Earth. So what?"

They exchanged glances, and Fuuma suddenly burst in laughter.

"The barrier," – he looked both angered and amused at the same time. – "Our power doesn't work here until it's broken. And I cannot destroy it."

"So what do we do now?" – Subaru looked incredulously at the stubborn door.

"We'll have to spend the night here," – Fuuma stretched and settled himself on the floor near window. – "Make yourself at home. We can marvel at the views of the night city, or… we can do something else."

Subaru sighed, leaning against the wall again. He began to feel serious unease about the whole situation.

The night was clear and cold. Big, almost full moon, flooded the room with bluish-silvery light, adding to the atmosphere of unreality. A damp night's air smelled of snow, and Subaru shivered.

"Are you cold?" – Fuuma suddenly appeared next to him. – "Want me to warm you up?"

The offer was made with such a suggestive tone that it sounded as ambiguous as it could only sound.

"Here, take this," – he continued, only after he fully enjoyed the effect, caused by his phrase.

Hot tea in plastic cup seemed like the most illogical development of events to Subaru.

"Thank you," – he muttered, feeling completely confused. White steam was rising from the cup, and pleasant warmth immediately flowed through Subaru's chilled fingers, where he was holding the light plastic. – "Where did you get this?"

"Here at this floor. If anything, hot drinks vending machine works regardless of presence of humans," – Fuuma looked very pleased with himself.

Subaru hesitated a little, before moving aside and freeing some space at his stretched coat on the floor. He silently gestured for Fuuma to sit next to him.

This time he slept without any dreams.


	5. Chapter 5

**_Disclaimer:_** I don't own anything, hearts and souls, and characters belong to CLAMP. And this story belongs to my real-life Subaru-kun (**itildin** on LJ), I've just translated it to English.

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><p>Sleeping on the floor, curled up in uncomfortable pose, was quite tiring. That's why, when he came to his own apartment the next day, Subaru for the first time appreciated comfort of his own bed.<p>

"Get some decent rest. I'll need you later," – Fuuma told him before disappearing among the crowd.

So now Subaru was trying to follow his advice, but couldn't fall asleep. His shoulder hurt from spending the night on the floor, the chill was coming from the window, somewhere outside loud voices were heard. Subaru sighed and turned to his back. He put his hands behind his head and stared at the ceiling.

"_I wonder where does he live himself,"_ – Subaru mused tiredly, trying to remember their conversations. – _"It's strange that subject never came out."_

Metal columns and supports of the Rainbow Bridge trembled and swayed, ready to collapse at any moment, and Subaru was immediately distracted from thinking about the Dark Kamui.

"_I need to put up the kekkai. Or else the bridge will collapse, and…"_ – what exactly "and" Subaru didn't manage to think through, too shocked with what was happening.

He couldn't create a kekkai.

Instead of the usual greenish glow of pentagram around him, the dust was raising in the air from broken plates, coloring the evening sky dirty, just like before.

"You cannot create a kekkai now even in your dream, Subaru-kun?" – the familiar voice asked, his owner clearly amused by said fact.

"_So I'm dreaming again. Well, if not in creating kekkai, at least I've succeeded in falling asleep,"_ – Subaru thought skeptically and turned around with a sigh.

"I can't," – he agreed, looking at Seishirou wearily. Tiny flame of the cigarette, lips, curved in a smirk, and eyes, hidden behind sunglasses. Subaru was surprised to realize that he wanted to see Seishirou's look not hidden by anything.

"_Why is it that even inside of my dreams everything's happening the way he wants it, and not me."_

"Have you chosen this place deliberately, Seishirou-san?" – standing on the Rainbow Bridge again, Subaru felt almost physical pain that couldn't be eased by any reasonable thinking that everything was over long ago.

"How can I choose anything, if this is your dream," – Seishirou's voice was still mocking, but his smile grew a bit softer. – "I simply missed you, so decided to drop by," – he threw his cigarette aside, orange sparks dancing over the concrete, and took a step towards the onmyouji. – "You look tired."

"I am tired," – Subaru was surprised by his own straightforwardness. – "Seishirou-san, can I ask you one question?" – he continued, suddenly changing the subject.

"Of course. Anything for my beloved Subaru-kun."

"You know something about the remaining barriers, don't you?" – he had a hard time choosing right words. – "I do not understand."

The next moment Subaru found himself pressed against the metal supports of the bridge. Sakura's branches were crawling over the metal, tying his wrists, and disabling movement. Subaru watched with astonishment how pale pink petals are falling around, trying to understand what was it in his question that made Seishirou angry. The Sakurazukamori's smile hasn't disappeared, but rather turned into icy one.

"Of course I do know what's going on," – Seishirou nodded, looking pleased, and the branches squeezed Subaru tighter, as if agreeing with the man. Subaru felt his wrists becoming hot and sticky, and realized it was his own blood flowing out of the cuts made by the tree.

"_Seems like I won't get away with only bruises this time."_

"You'll understand it all too, if you use what I left to you. And no, I'm not talking about the credit card."

It was said with such a meaningful smirk, that Subaru couldn't help blushing.

"Seishirou-san, I… I wasn't going to…"

"_Seems like my habit of making excuses and apologizing will never disappear,"_ – Subaru couldn't figure whether he should be happy or sad about that.

"So, any ideas what am I talking about?" – Seishirou's voice sounded cold, and together with his unreadable face expression it made something squeeze painfully in Subaru's chest.

"_What is he talking about? My eye?"_ – Subaru mechanically reached for his right golden-brown eye. Well, not exactly his. Branches jerked his hand back, almost twisting his wrist.

"I see, wrong answer," – the onmyouji snorted in annoyance, and it was so unlike him that Seishirou raised his eyebrows in mild surprise.

"You've been influenced badly by socializing with… some people, Subaru-kun."

A few moments later Subaru realized he was talking about Fuuma.

"Your house? Or something inside your house?" – Subaru tensed, avoiding to meet Seishirou's gaze.

The man didn't answer, but, judging by weakened grasp of the branches and gentle touch of petals against his skin, Subaru was moving in right direction.

"_What can it be so important inside Seishirou-san's house?"_ – he sighed mentally, dissatisfied with his own inability to guess. – _"No wonder that back then I didn't even suspect what kind of man he really was. Even now I cannot say I know him well."_

Drops of blood colored petals crimson. Only now it was his own blood. Subaru shook his head, trying to focus.

"Come on, Subaru-kun," – Seishirou was losing patience. – "How did you even become an onmyouji."

"_Right."_

"The books? From your library?" – the world around him was filled with colored spots, and Subaru couldn't understand whether it was just his tiredness, or the dream was coming to an end.

"There you go, you got an answer for your question," – Seishirou removed his sunglasses, as if he guessed Subaru's unspoken wish.

It was a rare occasion to get honesty from Seishirou in return, but now his smile seemed peaceful and kind. Subaru decided to go for it.

"Seishirou-san, back then, on the Rainbow Bridge," – the words seemed to be stuck in his throat, and his whole body resonated with inner pain, but he forced himself to continue. – "What you said to me… was that truth?" – Subaru's voice sounded pleading and somewhat pitiful.

"Now then, that is the second question already, Subaru-kun," – Seishirou smirked, dissolving into petals.

The bridge swayed and began to collapse. Metallic supports deformed with a protesting screech, concrete plates, crossed by deep cuts, crumbled into dust.

"_I don't care what will happen to me."_

* * *

><p>"Subaru! Subaru, wake up," – somebody was persistently shaking him by his shoulder.<p>

The onmyouji opened his eyes with an effort, mindlessly staring in front of him.

"Seishirou-san…"

"What's wrong with you?" – Fuuma looked both worried and annoyed at the same time. – "Some dreams you have there, I gotta tell you," – he nodded towards Subaru's wrists.

The onmyouji slowly raised his hand, looking puzzled at the sight of flowing blood.

"Just don't tell me it was wild S&M in handcuffs. What?" – Fuuma honestly wondered, meeting the skeptical look of mismatched eyes. – "Do you have bandages somewhere around?"

"I think the first aid kit was supposed to be in bathroom," – Subaru sounded hoarse after sleep.

"I'll check," – Fuuma went out of the room, and returned few moments later, carrying some sort of first aid kit, if you could call such an old paper box that barely held itself together, with medicines inside.

"By the way, what are you doing here? I remember I locked the door," – Subaru came to his senses a little, and now was wondering about more practical matters.

"I honestly rang at your doorbell. Thrice. But since I got no reply, I had to use my other skills," – Fuuma gestured towards an opened balcony door. – "Stay still, I'll close it," – he stopped Subaru, who was beginning to get up from his bed. – "Between us, you have real mess in your bathroom. Only spider web is missing."

"I just barely come here anymore," – Subaru caught his pajamas shirt, that was sliding off his shoulder. The old pajamas were hanging around him, making the already thin figure even more fragile.

"Let me see your hands," – Fuuma settled himself on the bed next to Subaru and concentrated at unfolding bandages.

Subaru complied obediently, and stretched out his arms, throwing glances at his wounded wrists.

"I won't ask you right now what exactly happened, but don't think this conversation is over," – Fuuma's tone was so serious that Subaru winced, and lowered his head.

"I'm fine."

"I can see that," – Fuuma snorted, and with sudden gentleness began to wrap bandages around the onmyouji's torn skin. – "Does it hurt?"

Subaru shook his head. He watched from beneath his lashes how his wrists gradually disappeared under the white bandages. Fuuma's moves were confident and gentle at the same time, and it was so different from his usual cruelness and nonchalance. Subaru's body was flown with pleasant warmth from Fuuma's touch, and the onmyouji caught himself starting to doze off.

"Here, done," – Fuuma eyed his work with evident satisfaction, and straightened ties on the bandages. – "Now sleep. I'll stay here, since I've already come."

"Thank you. But I cannot sleep right now, I have to…" – Subaru felt that he's falling asleep from the other man's silent spell, and decided not to fight against it.


	6. Chapter 6

**_Disclaimer:_** I don't own anything, hearts and souls, and characters belong to CLAMP. And this story belongs to my real-life Subaru-kun (**itildin** on LJ), I've just translated it to English.

* * *

><p>"I need to get back to Seishirou-san's house," – Subaru clenched the beige ceramic cup in his hands. Black coffee without sugar was counting as breakfast for him. – "We'll find what we need in one of the books from his library."<p>

"You're talking about the barriers?" – Fuuma stopped eating sandwiches he got who knows where for a moment, and gave a questioning look at his companion.

"Yes. Besides…" – Subaru fell in his thoughts, and didn't finish the phrase. Coffee was leaving bitter aftertaste in his mouth, which seemed surprisingly suitable for the place and situation – here, on the brink of an end of the world.

"Maybe we should finish breakfast first? The books aren't going anywhere," – Fuuma glanced at the paper bag from which all sorts of tempting smells were coming.

"I've eaten already," – Subaru put away the half-empty cup, and touched the bandages on his wrists mechanically.

"You call that 'eaten'?" – Fuuma arched his eyebrow. – "Rather than eye, Seishirou should have left you a printed menu for the day. He sure knew to appreciate a good meal. Here," – Fuuma pushed the paper bag towards Subaru and got up from his chair. – "I'll pack your belongings so that we don't waste time. We need to get train tickets yet."

"'We'?"

"Of course. You don't think you're going alone, now do you," – Fuuma stopped in the doorway and turned around.

"But I can handle that myself," – Subaru didn't know exactly why he protested. Maybe it was just his eternal habit of not bothering others with his business, or maybe being with Fuuma in Seishirou's place seemed as something unreasonable and inappropriate to do.

"We'll be faster if there will be two of us," – Fuuma smirked with self-satisfaction and got out of the kitchen, leaving Subaru with cakes from the paper bag.

* * *

><p>"Eating cakes for breakfast seems kind of strange to me," – Subaru was holding the half-empty bag on his knees, throwing glances through the train's window from time to time. Grey town was merging with grey skies. Long time ago Subaru loved this city.<p>

"Mm, does it?" – Fuuma was digging through the bag with clothes, clearly trying to find something.

"Where did you get them anyway?"

"Bought of course, where else," - another zipper on the bag was opened with discontented grinding.

"It's just that…" – Subaru hesitated, but then continued. – "You were gonna stay at my place while I was asleep."

"One does not interfere with another," – Fuuma chuckled, not stopping to dig through the bag thoroughly.

"Just what are you trying to find in there?" – Subaru asked, mildly annoyed. He couldn't say such petty things bothered him, but still, when somebody is digging through your belongings, it's somewhat irritating.

"Is all of your clothes black?" – Fuuma looked honestly surprised.

"Not all," – Subaru suddenly recalled his smeared with blood beige coat from the bridge in memory, and lowered his gaze. – "What's the difference anyway."

"None," – Fuuma agreed easily. – "But you look very suspiciously, when you're dressed in all black."

"And you look like sadist and masochist at once, with all those rivets and straps of yours," – Subaru rubbed his right eye and looked at Fuuma with wonder. – "Why am I telling you all of this?"

"I don't really know," – Fuuma smirked, reaching forward, and suddenly closed the brown eye with his palm.

"Don't," – Subaru gently removed his hand, and didn't say a word until the end of their trip.

* * *

><p>"Looks like duty of the Sakurazukamori implied a good paycheck," – Fuuma whistled, looking around the place. – "How many are there?"<p>

"Of whom?" – Subaru blinked in confusion. He was digging through his pockets, trying to find keys to the door. – "Where did I put it?"

"Not 'whom', but 'what'," – Fuuma corrected. – "The rooms. This place looks quite big," – he took the bag with Subaru's things, that the onmyouji left on the ground, forgetting about it completely, as it seemed.

"I don't know, I've never put much attention to it," – Subaru said absently. He finally located keys and opened the door that led inside the house.

Perfect order, just like in the rest of the house, looked almost unnatural in the bedroom. As if Seishirou Sakurazuka somehow inexplicably erased even the slightest traces of him existing anywhere at all.

"You suit yourself, but as for me, I'm going to shower," – Fuuma casually tossed bag on the floor, dug out a towel from it, lazily stretched, and began to remove his coat.

"Yes, whatever. All you might need is supposed to be in there," – Subaru was replying, as if he was dreaming, and reality ceased to exist. He slowly sat down on the bed and ran his fingers over the bed-cover. As if stroking it.

"You are so hospitable," – Fuuma chuckled mockingly, and Subaru got distracted from the flood of sudden memories, turning his attention to Fuuma again.

"What are you doing?" – he'd surely blush and begin to stutter some years ago, but now he just felt faint surprise, mixed with embarrassment.

"_I guess one may call this progress,"_ – Subaru mentally chided himself for showing reaction at all.

"What do you mean what am I doing?" – Fuuma looked at him blankly, unzipping his jeans.

"Well… you're undressing here," – Subaru's voice faded to whisper against his will, giving some absurd intimacy to the moment.

"Because it's uncomfortable to do that inside the bathroom?" – Fuuma explained with deliberate sympathy. He threw the towel on his shoulder and added, smirking. – "I'll be quick. Don't get bored."

Subaru chided himself mentally once more. This time for being unable to find appropriate words in situations like this.

* * *

><p>Yellowed by time greeting card kept the smell of faded camellia. The flower showered withered, faded petals that once were crimson, as soon as Subaru barely touched it.<p>

He repeatedly re-read a short text, as if trying to see something more behind few simple lines of birthday congratulations.

Seishirou never told him his real birth date, and now Subaru felt a strange mix of emotions.

November the twenty-second.

Subaru was looking at the date, at uneven, obviously hastily sketched lines, and could not bring himself to put the card away and start doing other, more pressing matters. A piece of life he'll never be part of anymore. Subaru was no longer happy that he decided to get down to business right away, and began to flip through the books that belonged to Seishirou. The card fell out from the first one already, and Subaru no longer felt like reading and searching for the information he needed. The barriers, the Dragons of Heaven and Earth, the end of the world – it all suddenly became unimportant and absolutely meaningless.

Subaru thoughtlessly turned the book that became useless, and noticed corner of some dense paper, squeezed between the pages.

…The paper turned out to be a photo, and that was too much for him to handle. The three of them looked so young. Subaru had forgotten that he could smile like that before, that Seishirou seemed to be simple and kind person, and Hokuto was alive.

"Where are you going?" – Fuuma came out from the shower with his hair wet, wearing only towel, carelessly wrapped around his thighs. He suspiciously glanced at Subaru, who halted in the doorway.

"I'll take a walk," – the onmyouji's voice sounded soft, but unnatural.

"At night?" – Fuuma arched his eyebrow skeptically, but the answer never came.

Subaru opened the door silently, letting the chilly air that smelled of rain come inside, and stepped out into the darkness.


	7. Chapter 7

**_Disclaimer:_** I don't own anything, hearts and souls, and characters belong to CLAMP. And this story belongs to my real-life Subaru-kun (**itildin** on LJ), I've just translated it to English.

* * *

><p>Once outside, Subaru stopped in confusion. He wasn't acquainted too well with this part of the city. Besides, the whole time he spent in Seishirou's house he perceived surrounding reality through the thick layer of fog in a way. No wonder he was now looking around, being lost, straightening his gloves out of habit, with no idea of where to go and why did he want to be alone in the first place. The first emotional storm was gone, leaving only some kind of sad bewilderment behind.<p>

Cold drizzle gradually turned into strong rain, and Subaru hurried to the closest building's entrance.

It was dark and pretty dirty inside, but Subaru wasn't bothered by it. He carefully pushed some torn scraps of paper and wrappers aside, and settled on the windowsill. Dim light was barely sufficient to discern lines of objects around. Mysteriously curved shadows glided over the walls and stairs, creating a sense of unreality.

Subaru glanced around him to make sure nobody was watching, and, closing his eyes, he put his palms together in the familiar gesture.

"Come on."

Nothing. He really couldn't create a kekkai anymore. Just like a long time ago.

* * *

><p>"Your duty as the thirteenth head of the Sumeragi clan is to protect Tokyo and…"<p>

Subaru didn't listen very carefully what followed. He just turned eighteen, and it was his first birthday that he celebrated all alone. If you can call it celebration - the apathetic gratitude in response to congratulations of relatives, and late supper in apartment where no one but him lived anymore.

"…the Sakurazukamori."

The name that made Subaru shudder and get back to reality.

"Eh? What?" – he asked absently.

"Subaru-san, you aren't even listening," – it was a statement rather than question. Before the former Sumeragi head would probably scold him about his manners, but now she just sighed.

"Sorry," – Subaru muttered out of habit more than out of actual guilt. He found it difficult to worry about insignificant things lately.

"I was saying that one of the Dragons of Earth is the Sakurazukamori, our enemy. That's why you have to…"

The news made Subaru inhale sharply. He felt the nasty ache inside his chest, but the worst of all was that somewhere deep beneath the layer of hatred, resentment and incomprehension, he also felt a sickening joy waking up. So, they'll surely meet again then, during the Final Battle. Subaru made an effort with all his will to think of the revenge only.

* * *

><p>Weak greenish glow flared over Subaru's open palms, and almost immediately faded. The onmyouji sighed and sat down on the grass in the vast garden that stretched in front of the Sumeragi house in Kyoto. He had already lost count of the number of attempts to create a kekkai. He couldn't do it. For the first time he couldn't do something, that usually took him no effort at all.<p>

"_I do not understand,"_ – Subaru thoughtfully turned the old manuscripts, that seemed to be ready to fall apart at any moment, in his hands. – _"It's just an ordinary spell. Well, not exactly ordinary…"_

Subaru for the umpteenth time read the elegant handwriting on the paper, but he didn't get any new ideas. From the technical point of view he was doing everything correctly, but nothing was happening. It was truth though, that at the end of the record there was one line that made him feel uneasy.

"_The kekkai is needed to protect what's most precious to one,"_ – Subaru could only smirk bitterly, when he read his ancient relative's advice over and over again – to think about the people important to him while creating a kekkai.

Subaru was trying. He thought of his relatives, acquaintances, people in general. Nothing. Nobody was scolding him, but as he went on with unsuccessful training, he was noticing more and more often the disapproving glances from the people of his clan. Of course – such a tradition, such a history, and here they are, with their new head not being only just a teenager, but also being unable to do such a trifle. The battle of Dragons of Heaven and Earth happened already before, long time ago, and the ancient manuscripts were the only evidence to it. While listening to how big clan of the Sumeragi is, and how much they did for Japan and the whole world in general, Subaru thought of asking who of the Dragons won that time before, but stopped himself on time, realizing the obviousness of answer.

* * *

><p>When he returned to Tokyo, Subaru continued his training. It still remained futile though. He knew the most complicated spells by heart and he could sense the presence of ghosts with no effort at all, but kekkai – he couldn't create it, as if it was enchanted.<p>

_"Seems like I'll be the most useless one of the Dragons of Heaven."_

In truth, Subaru was just afraid to admit even to himself, the thoughts of whom exactly might help him create the kekkai. To him it was equal losing the battle before its beginning.

"_I need to take a walk. It helps not to think about… things I'm not supposed to think about."_

The evening city was choking the onmyouji by its indifferent splendor – inviting neon commercial signs and sky, lined with fake stars.

Subaru's attention was drawn to the cigarette vending machine. Long time ago – Subaru felt as if it's been centuries since that day, although it was not even two years ago – he bought a pack of cigarettes for Seishirou at a vending machine like that. Unexpectedly even to himself, Subaru absently grabbed some money from his pocket, and a moment later he was the owner of slightly crumpled pack of some cheap cigarettes by an unknown brand, and a simple lighter.

"_Maybe this will help me get stronger."_

He spun the wheel of lighter with insecurity and awkwardness, and hastily drew in bitter smoke, making tiny flame at the tip of his cigarette brighter.

Memories over-flooded him at once, uninvited, leaving emptiness inside. Seishirou, who rescued him from Hokuto's overwhelming activity and sent him to get a pack of cigarettes instead of singing karaoke. Seishirou, who was casually holding the half-faded cigarette, shaking off the ashes. Seishirou, jokingly advising him not to take bad examples.

His palms put themselves together mechanically in a well-studied gesture, and Subaru, with bitter amazement, watched his own kekkai in the form of pentagram flooding all around with green light. People were gone, numerous lights faded out, and buildings were covered by haze.

"_I made it."_

Subaru couldn't say he was happy about it.

* * *

><p>Fuuma, now dressed properly, was waiting for him at home, waving that photo in his hand with a mocking look.<p>

"You went away because of this?" – he asked skeptically, showing no sign of even slightest respect towards Subaru's sudden reason for sadness.

"Strange, I thought I've taken that with me," – the onmyouji absently began to take off his coat, splashing raindrops along the way – the fabric was completely drenched with rain.

His dark grown hair was wet and stuck to his face, as he was trying not to shiver too obviously, though he was cold.

"How did you manage this?" – Fuuma nonchalantly ran his hand through Subaru's wet locks, slightly burying his fingers in his hair.

"It's raining heavily outside," – the onmyouji shrugged indifferently.

"I can understand that, but how could you get _so _wet," – Fuuma was looking at him with interest and curiosity. – "Get undressed."

"I had already," – Subaru threw a glance at his coat on the hanger. On the floor beneath a puddle of water was forming slowly, but surely.

"Take off all of your clothes. You're wet completely," – Fuuma, not paying attention to the other man's protests, pushed Subaru into the room. – "Wait a second here," – he said and disappeared into the bathroom.

Few moments later he returned and casually threw a towel and dry pajamas to Subaru.

"I've decided to look around the house while you were, er, taking a stroll," – he explained, catching Subaru's questioning gaze.

Left alone in the room, Subaru began to pull off his sweater. The fabric was sticking to his body, being completely soaked by rain. The onmyouji was shivering, but if Fuuma didn't point out that he needed to change, it's unlikely that Subaru himself would even think about it.

By the time Fuuma returned, carrying some glass in his hand, Subaru had just finished pulling on pajamas. The sleeves were too long and he had to tuck them. Pajamas were too big for his size in general, and hang around his slender figure so freely that he had to catch the shirt that was sliding off his shoulders constantly.

"Here, drink this," – Fuuma handed him the glass, and the liquid inside splashed over the transparent frame, as if inviting to drink.

"What's that?" – Subaru mechanically took the offered drink. From the glass a pleasant warmth was coming, and he gently squeezed it in his hands.

"Fruit drink," – Fuuma said calmly.

Subaru immediately took a big gulp, leaving less than a half in a glass, and coughed, feeling the hot burning taste of the drink.

"It's not a fruit drink," – he wheezed out with surprise, trying to catch his breath.

"Well, almost. It's warmed wine. And right now it's much more useful to you," – Fuuma carefully took the half-empty glass from Subaru's hands and put it aside. – "Seems to me that you've had enough though," – he decided, looking at Subaru with mocking attention.

The onmyouji felt his cheeks were beginning to burn, and the world around was blurry and slightly swaying. More so, he suddenly became sleepy, and Subaru carefully lay on the bed, trying not to lose his balance, while wrapping himself with blanket.

"So what are you dreaming about?" – Fuuma asked, suddenly being serious, nodding towards the bandages on Subaru's wrists.

"Seishirou-san," – Subaru sleepily looked at him through lowered lashes, and seemed to be answering more to himself than to the other man.

"Does that have any connection with the barriers?" – Fuuma frowned.

"I do not know," – Subaru honestly admitted. – "I was about to dig into the books to find out the reason for all of it. If not for your 'juice'," – he added with mild reprimand, before giving in and drifting into a sleep.


	8. Chapter 8

**_Disclaimer:_** I don't own anything, hearts and souls, and characters belong to CLAMP. And this story belongs to my real-life Subaru-kun (**itildin** on LJ), I've just translated it to English.

* * *

><p>The next day welcomed Subaru with splitting headache. Unbearably bright sun was persistently banging into the window, as it seemed to him. In fact, cold winter sunlight was rather pale and wasn't shining as strongly, but for Subaru all things his sensations perceived seemed exaggerated and quite annoying.<p>

"Oow," – he turned to his stomach with a groan, and tried to hide his head beneath the pillow.

"Oh no, you won't," – somebody pulled the blanket off him and snatched his beloved pillow away, touching his skin with something icy.

"Fuuma, what are you doing?" – Subaru sat on the bed with a disgruntled moan, opening his eyes. Seems that his organism didn't like that – headache came in with a sudden strength, making the onmyouji squeeze his temples with his palms.

"Why, look at that. So you're having the first hangover in your life," – Fuuma laughed, and Subaru threw an angry glance at him. – "Here, drink, this might help."

Subaru mechanically reached out to grab the glass with some transparent liquid. Cool glass touched his fingers, and he realized this was what he felt on his skin earlier.

"What is this?" – he asked suspiciously. His throat was sore and his voice sounded hoarse because of that, barely making out words. – "Not another 'fruit drink', I hope?" – Subaru skeptically measured the glass with his gaze, not daring to take a sip.

"Of course it isn't. Just usual mineral water," – Fuuma was looking at him with some strange expression in his dark eyes, and Subaru hastily drew few sips from the glass. He studied himself with confusion. Fresh bandages on his wrists, pajamas, which slid off his shoulder... and too hazy memories of yesterdays evening.

"I, er… didn't do anything weird, did I?" – Subaru carefully asked the question that was bothering him, trying not to blush.

"You did. And you were very good at it," – Fuuma's smirk was turning one's thoughts in pretty obvious direction. – "You fell asleep," – he finished innocently.

"And the bandages? These are fresh," – Subaru touched them, as if was making sure they were real.

"I changed them," – Fuuma shrugged. – "Old ones were completely drenched in rain and were useless."

"T-thank you."

_"When was it the last time I thanked to anybody?"_

Subaru's mental question was left unanswered.

* * *

><p>The next time Subaru woke up was closer to evening. It seemed that alcohol had almost completely vent out from his system, leaving slight dizziness behind.<p>

He dreamed of Seishirou again. But this time there was no falling petals or rough branches, nor endless dark water. Just ironic gaze of Seishirou's brown eye upon him.

"We need to begin to search through the books," – Subaru rubbed his eyes, shaking off the remnants of sleep.

"We sure do," – Fuuma agreed, peeking into the room. – "But breakfast first. Though it's more like supper," – he snorted. – "So much for making you warm, eh."

He came closer to Subaru – right on time. The onmyouji swayed, while getting up from the bed, and Fuuma grabbed him by his shoulders, supporting Subaru.

"Honestly, I even fear to let you go," – he remarked after a few moments. His voice sounded mocking, as usual, but this time underneath that taunting tone, hidden tension was heard.

Subaru frowned, gently freeing himself from the grip.

"Lets go, you need to eat before we start working," – Fuuma's voice was a bit hoarse.

"I'm not hungry," – Subaru searched the room with his gaze, trying to locate his clothes.

"Yeah, right," – Fuuma almost pushed him into the kitchen, and didn't leave him alone until Subaru started to eat. He really wasn't hungry, but saying no would be impolite, the onmyouji was thinking, since the food was made especially for him.

_"It's strange – I thought I've stopped worrying about other people _long ago_."_

The thought made him smirk, and Fuuma, noticing that, glanced at Subaru with curiosity.

"I'm fine," – the onmyouji reassured him. – "You're cooking pretty good," – he added with mild surprise.

"Not exactly me, to be more precise," – Fuuma grinned coldly, and the rest of supper passed in silence.

* * *

><p>"What, we'll have to read all of these?" – Fuuma eyed the big heap of books with displeasure.<p>

Subaru providently moved part of the books into the living room, carefully spreading them over the coffee table.

"The remaining barriers will fall by themselves before we read this. From old age," – Fuuma snorted.

"These, and a lot more. I only brought some of books, so that we start from something," – Subaru explained calmly, ignoring Fuuma's discontent.

"Oh, come on, seriously! Didn't your precious Seishirou-san give you at least _some_ hint about where exactly should we look?" – Fuuma glanced upon old books with exasperation.

"No, he didn't say anything specific," – Subaru sighed and stroked his bandages automatically.

Fuuma looked at him, studying, nodded to his own thoughts, and not saying anything more, settled himself on couch with the first book that fell into his hands.

Silence wrapped the room, being disturbed only by barely audible rustle of turning pages. For Subaru these books meant much more than just black letters on white pages. They belonged to Seishirou, and the feeling of his presence enshrouded the onmyouji. He had completely focused on reading, forgetting about time.

"A bit more, and I'll be able to work for the both of you," – Fuuma's disgruntled voice returned Subaru to reality. The teenager was waving with one of the books, its old pages almost flew all over the room. – "My power would be sufficient for all these spells here," – he tsked and lazily stretched, deciding to make a pause. His patience lasted for half an hour more.

"That's it, I can't take this anymore," – Fuuma yawned and lazily stretched over the couch again, crossing his hands behind his head. – "I want – naturally – to bring down the barriers and fulfill earth's wish and all that, but I think, we can continue this tomorrow."

"Go to sleep if you're tired," – Subaru suggested softly.

"What about you?"

"I'll read a bit more."

In truth, Subaru didn't want to break this feeling of connection to Seishirou. Even if it was mere illusion and rather pathetic, but it was all he had left. The onmyouji went to sleep closer to the dawn, when the night's sky began turn into grey, signalizing beginning of the new day.

* * *

><p>The days that followed were all alike – filled with the routine of studying books. That is, studying books mostly fell on Subaru. For Fuuma flipping through the old pages was too boring, and usually, after some time he'd begin to walk from one corner of the room to another, or snatch food from the fridge, or distract Subaru with the talk.<p>

"Maybe you should go take a walk?" – Subaru rubbed his eyes tiredly, and squinted at Fuuma, who was purposely holding the book upside down, pretending to be concentrated on reading. Subaru's right eye was hurting again, and he automatically covered it with his palm.

"You know what – it's a great idea," – Fuuma agreed lightly, and a moment later he was gone into the mist of early winter's evening, preferring the window for going out rather than the door.

Being left alone, Subaru sighed with an obvious relief. Fuuma was more hindrance than help in this. It looked like Kamui of the Dragons of Earth was completely incapable of doing the routine work. During all this time he barely flipped through couple of books, the rest of time just laying on couch, or collecting dust from the floor with his clothes, trying to find comfortable pose, or was hanging around the kitchen eating sandwiches, and was breaking Subaru's concentration with constant talks on all possible and impossible topics.

"_I hope the work will go faster now,"_ – Subaru thought to himself.

But he was wrong. It seemed that the tiredness was getting better of him. His eyelids were heavy and his headache returned, threatening to split his head in two. Subaru rubbed his temples, trying to chase the unexpected sleepiness away, but it didn't help much.

"_Alright, I'll rest for a few minutes and will continue,"_ – he surrendered eventually.

* * *

><p>"I'm home! Were you missing me and my kind and precious help?" – Fuuma wondered mockingly, peering into the study, where bookshelves were. And halted.<p>

Subaru was asleep, his head rested over the book that was in front of him on the table. Even in sleep his face was pale and tired, and in his fragile silhouette tension was present.

Trying not to make any noise, Fuuma came closer and for a few moments just watched the onmyouji sleep. Then he lifted him into his arms, and carefully carried into the bedroom.

"Honestly, you need to eat more often," – he muttered pensively. – "You're as light as a feather."

He put Subaru onto the bed and, after a brief consideration, pulled the blanket over him, making sure it's spread all over his body – nights were still very cold.

"Well then, good night," – Fuuma smirked slightly and went out of the room, turning the light off.


	9. Chapter 9

**_Disclaimer:_** I don't own anything, hearts and souls, and characters belong to CLAMP. And this story belongs to my real-life Subaru-kun (**itildin** on LJ), I've just translated it to English.

* * *

><p><em>"I'll wake up now, and will continue to read on from where I've stopped,"<em> – Subaru opened his eyes with that thought, and tried to turn the page. Of course, there was no any book in front of him. He even wasn't at the table in the study, but in the bed. On top of everything, carefully covered by blanket.

Subaru sat and looked around, puzzled, trying to remember how did he get here.

_"As I recall, I wanted to rest a little bit, and accidentally fell asleep. But that happened in the study, not here. So that means…"_

The thought of Fuuma not only carrying him into the bedroom and putting him to sleep, but also covering him by the blanket, made him feel very strange.

_"As if he's not exactly Kamui of the Dragons of Earth anymore,"_ – the onmyouji hesitantly got up and stretched, making his way into the living room.

"Oh, you're awake already. I thought you'll be sleeping through all day," – Fuuma arched his eyebrow ironically and put magazine he was reading aside – clearly it had nothing to do with their research.

"Thank you for carrying me there," – Subaru yawned and settled at the table.

"You need to take a break," – Fuuma's voice was unexpectedly serious, making Subaru raise his head in surprise. The teenager's dark eyes were looking at him with unreadable expression. – "Or else I'll have to carry you to the bedroom again," – he finished with a smirk.

"I am not tired," – Subaru shook his head and looked around, trying to locate books he left on the table in this room.

Fuuma's smirk widened, and Subaru suddenly realized not only books were missing that he left opened on the desk, but all other books were gone as well. Instead of them table seemed to be filled with some magazines with clearly not-really-appropriate-for-children content, judging by covers. Subaru thought that before he'd surely blush, and then turned his gaze to Fuuma again.

"Like I said, no work for you today," – the teenager shrugged carelessly. - "The study looks the same, just so you know - all of its shelves."

"Fine, but how…" – Subaru halted, and understood, after he concentrated.

It was an illusion. Not very strong one, but pretty good nonetheless.

"…how did you manage to do this?" – he finished his thought. And realized, with amazement, he really wanted to hear the answer.

_"Genuine interest for things is not something I've been experiencing a lot lately. For the last several years, to be more precise,"_ – the thought made him sigh.

"I see you already figured what we have here," – Fuuma looked extremely smug. – "It's like I told you, a bit more of this tedious reading, and I'll be able to do all kinds of these tricks of yours."

"You mean an illusion spell," – Subaru corrected him. – "Pretty good. For the first-timer," – he added a bit mockingly.

"Anyway, no stupid books for you today."

"Alright," – Subaru gave up. – "It's easier for me to take a break than to cut myself with ofuda, trying to break this illusion. So what are you up to?"

"We'll just rest, Subaru," – Fuuma stood up from the couch, and came over to Subaru, raising his head by his chin. – "Do you even know how to rest at all?" – he studied onmyouji's mismatched eyes. For a moment he thought he saw displeasure and suspicion in his right, golden-brown one.

* * *

><p>"Where are we going?" – Subaru asked cautiously, wrapping tighter in his coat. Winter wind was piercing cold, and Subaru regretted he left his gloves at home.<p>

"Grocery shopping," – Fuuma replied merrily. – "You don't think the food just shows up in the fridge now, do you?" – he added, answering to the confused silence that came from the other side.

"Right," – Subaru's reply was barely audible, as if the onmyouji was talking to himself. In truth, he was never giving much thought to these things. At first he had Hokuto to always take care of him, and then… then it just became unimportant.

* * *

><p>The big mall seemed to be unaffected by recent events - it was still crowdy and noisy. As if there were no any broken barriers, or the oncoming end of the world didn't exist. This part of the city still wasn't damaged, and there was visibly more people here, than in other districts.<p>

Inside the mall, Subaru threw confused and lost glances around, as if not knowing what to do next.

"Honestly, you really need to do something more..." - Fuuma paused for a moment, thinking of the right word. - "...earthy, from time to time."

"Why do all your phrases sound like you mean entirely different things rather than just grocery shopping."

"It's your imagination," - Fuuma snorted and dragged Subaru to the rows with all kinds of food and other products.

Subaru never thought before that usual grocery shopping could be so time-consuming. Fuuma was meticulously examining every jar, can and package, lingering at each shelf.

"Judging by how you're helping me with the books, I wouldn't say you're so meticulous," - Subaru chuckled involuntarily, watching Fuuma's actions. - "What's not alright to you with these lettuce? They are no different from previous ones."

"You just don't understand a thing about it," - Fuuma waved him off, enthusiastically digging into vegetables.

Subaru could only acquiesce with that, and tune into a long wait.

He couldn't believe it, when they finally reached cash register.

"Looks like I've forgotten to take the money," - Fuuma began to recheck his pockets with deliberately mournful look.

"Don't tell me you made me tag along just because of that," - Subaru without particularly high hopes reached for the inner pocket on his coat. Smooth plastic slid into his palm, and Subaru pulled out his own credit card with surprise. - "It's strange that I forgot about it," - he turned the discovery in his fingers with bewilderment.

Watching how Fuuma diligently sorts food into the bags, Subaru caught himself thinking again, that looking like this, Fuuma looks more like his previous self rather than the Dragon of Earth.

_"Even though I didn't know him before, it's hard to believe that 'Kamui' would be doing something like this. It's too... ordinary."_

"Fuuma?" - Subaru touched the other man's shoulder insecurely, and serious gaze of the dark eyes fell upon him.

In the next moment though, Fuuma fixed his sunglasses, smirking, and handed Subaru one of the bags, looking like his usual self again.

"According to these pointers, there should be pretty good cafe nearby. Lets go," - Fuuma yanked Subaru after him, skillfully making his way through the crowd.

"You've eaten recently," - Subaru blinked, and raised his brows. But display of big electronic clock didn't agree with him - looking at numbers, Subaru figured they've spent couple of hours in the mall already.

* * *

><p>Cafe didn't look bad indeed - small and quiet, with little neat tables. Most of the places were free, and Subaru found himself confused again, not knowing which seat to pick.<p>

"Sit down already," - Fuuma pushed Subaru towards the closest free table, and went to the bar, shortly adding, - "I'll bring us something."

"You said you had no money," - Subaru remarked, when Fuuma came back carrying a tray with his order.

"I just didn't want to spend money on usual food," - Fuuma chuckled, and gave a bowl with ice cream to Subaru. - "Here, try this. The best in whole Tokyo. I didn't think they were still selling it somewhere," - he enthusiastically took up his own portion.

"Eh, thanks," - Subaru began to dig into ice cream with spoon, slowly, clearly thinking of something else.

"Yeah, Seishirou sure was more delighted about the treat," - Fuuma couldn't resist making that observation, after studying Subaru's actions skeptically for some time.

"What? Seishirou-san..." - the onmyouji froze on the spot, ceasing to turn over pieces of his ice cream, and looked at Fuuma with his mismatched eyes widened in amazement.

"Ah, yes, you don't know, do you," - Fuuma smirked somewhat strangely, and continued. - "We went for ice cream together. And not only ice cream, actually," - he added. - "Seishirou was generally good in picking delicious food."

"Like I said," - Subaru couldn't suppress a sigh. - "You knew him way better," - he smiled weakly, and started to fumble a napkin with cafe's logo in his hands.

He felt both sadness and curiosity at the same time. Curiosity has won in the end, and Subaru hesitantly asked his question:

"Where else did you go together?"

"For pancakes, in a really great place - unfortunately, ruined now. It was a great service there though," - Fuuma replied casually, as if not noticing Subaru's tension. - "Spending time with Seishirou always was pretty fun."

"Oh. Maybe you didn't only eat together?" - Subaru couldn't resist the cynical remark.

Fuuma nearly choked on his ice cream, looked at Subaru with indescribable expression, and then burst into laughter.

"Me? With Seishirou?"

When he stopped laughing, Fuuma glanced at Subaru with interest, and asked suspiciously:

"Why, are you jealous?"

Not waiting for an answer, he stood up and went to the bar to get more ice cream.

* * *

><p>Back at home, the first thing Subaru noticed was that illusion dispersed, and books were at their rightful places again.<p>

"Maybe I should..." - he began, squinting at shelves.

"No, you won't be digging through the books today, don't even start," - Fuuma literally pushed Subaru out of the study. - "Besides, your coat isn't suitable for winter at all, it will be better for you to get yourself warm and go to sleep now," - noticing Subaru's puzzled look, Fuuma explained, smirking. - "You kept wrapping in your coat and shivering on the way back."

"We just shouldn't eat ice cream in such a weather," - Subaru replied softly, but Fuuma wasn't listening.

* * *

><p>Subaru routinely turned pages of the next book, when he felt intent look upon himself, coming from Fuuma.<p>

"What is it?" - he raised his head in wonder and smiled faintly.

Fuuma, as usually, was comfortably stretched over the couch. He scattered some books around himself, along with several separated pages he didn't even touch. Watching Subaru read seemed much more interesting to him. Fuuma thought that he didn't notice before how the onmyouji frowns slightly, while his eyes are sliding over lines in the book, or how he halts at some moments longer than usual, grasping the meaning of written thoughtfully.

Fuuma was going to answer something evasive, but Subaru, turning the page, suddenly froze, re-reading the lines in disbelief. Several moments later he said slowly:

"Looks like I found what we were looking for."


	10. Chapter 10

**_Disclaimer:_** I don't own anything, hearts and souls, and characters belong to CLAMP. And this story belongs to my real-life Subaru-kun (**itildin** on LJ), I've just translated it to English.

* * *

><p>Heavy silence wrapped them like a cloak, as they were making their way towards the Tokyo Tower. Subaru was quiet and focused, frowning slightly, while trying to calculate the sequence of upcoming actions, and completely ignoring all Fuuma's attempts to start a conversation with him.<p>

"Enough already," – Fuuma couldn't stand it any longer. He roughly grabbed Subaru by his shoulders and turned him around, forcing the onmyouji to pay attention. – "What are you up to?" – he squeezed his fingers tighter, and Subaru winced unwillingly – either because of pain, or because he's been drawn out of his thoughts – Fuuma couldn't tell.

"We're almost there," – Subaru softly wriggled out of the other man's grip. – "I promise, I'll tell you all you need to know as soon as we get to the Tower. We shouldn't waste time."

"Fine," – Fuuma agreed querulously. – "You don't seem to be acting like yourself, ever since you came across that book."

Early winter twilight rapidly fell onto the city, and when they noticed the sharp spike of the Tokyo Tower in front of them, it was almost completely dark. It looked like a lot of things had changed since their last visit to this place – now the surrounding area was almost completely flooded. The base of the Tower was hidden in the dark mirror-like surface, which reflected stars.

"I think this should work," – Subaru hesitantly touched the water, and surface covered in disgruntled ripples.

"Careful," – Fuuma pulled him back, away from the water. – "This thing looks like it has no bottom at all."

"In a certain way, you're right," – Subaru was looking at him with such seriousness in his mismatched eyes, that Fuuma felt uncomfortable.

"Why don't you tell me what you read in that book already? I'm all ears," – Fuuma hmphed in annoyance, making it clear he won't move from the spot until he hears what he wants.

"What I found out might seem, perhaps, rather strange," – Subaru began uncertainly, pulling his gloves off and reaching for the ofuda in the pocket of his coat. Touching soft, slightly rough paper was somehow comforting him, helping concentrate. – "Each world has its own…" – he halted, choosing the most appropriate word. – "Reflection."

"And our does too?" – Fuuma wondered mistrustfully.

"As the matter of fact, yes," – Subaru sat on dusty, jagged debris, giving Fuuma the inviting look to sit down as well. The ofuda in his hands were giving off faint greenish glow. – "And, most importantly, these worlds are linked by the same destiny."

"Wait, so you're saying that, basically, we're running around here, waving swords and all, and in fact, it's all already done and over with? And to top that, hell knows where?" – Fuuma looked displeased, as if he was deprived of his favorite entertainment.

"That's one way to put it, yes," – Subaru quietly smiled, watching Fuuma's suddenly changed expression.

"Well, fine. But what about the barriers, then?" – Fuuma finally settled down beside Subaru, even though he found it uncomfortable to sit on rough stones.

"Water."

"What – water? You aren't making it any clearer," – the Dark Kamui snorted, looking at Subaru's face in darkness.

Thin, delicate features, and barely visible tension.

"Water connects the two words together. It seems that in that other Tokyo only two barriers remained – the very same you can't bring down in here. And as long as they exist there, they cannot be destroyed here."

"So, if the city wouldn't be flooded, no problems would arise with me breaking down the barriers?" – Fuuma raised his eyebrow, puzzled.

"Seems like that," – Subaru replied in the same tone.

"Damn you, Seishirou," – Fuuma cursed, with disappointment in his voice, mixed with surprise. – "Could it be he was deliberately helping destroy the barriers so eagerly, to create this mess?"

"That much I do not know," – Subaru shook his head. He remembered dark, swallowing depths from his dreams, the water he thought he saw near the Government Building, Seishirou's hints…

"_Back there, at the Rainbow Bridge, there was also so much water. Could __it __be __that__…"_

"So, what now?" – Fuuma glanced at Subaru with interest – seemed like what he heard had amused him more than disappointed.

"I think we should try to get into that other Tokyo," – the onmyouji's tone sounded so casual, as if it was a mere walk to the nearest quarter.

"What for? So I could tear down the remaining two barriers?" – Fuuma smirked with self-satisfaction. – "You're so thoughtful."

"No," – Subaru shook his head slowly. He couldn't name the reason himself, which made him care about the possible outcome of all events, even after all he's been through. – "No, it's not about that," – he repeated. – "As it appears, in the other Tokyo only two barriers remained. That means…"

"The future has already arrived in there," – Fuuma finished his thought. – "And because of that, it no longer depends on what we do here – everything's already preordained."

"Yes, exactly," – Subaru was spinning the ofuda in his hands absently, as if trying to make a decision.

"You want to know what kind of future is that," – not a question, a statement. Fuuma carefully observed Subaru's face, suddenly becoming very serious.

"Yes," – Subaru got up from the debris. Icy night breeze instantly ruffled his black, too long hair, but Subaru didn't seem to notice, completely drawn in his thoughts. – "Besides," – he added softly. – "Seishirou-san obviously wanted for us to get there."

"Oh, well, if Seishirou-san wanted that, it must be a great idea."

Subaru preferred to pretend he didn't hear the other man's sarcasm.

"I trust him when it comes to things like this."

Fuuma only shrugged in response, and didn't say anything more.

"I do not insist for you to come with me," – Subaru clarified. His voice sounded guilty, and it felt strange and wrong.

"You don't think I'll let you go alone now, do you," – Fuuma came closer, grinning, and glanced at the ofuda in Subaru's hands with curiosity. – "You know, what you have to do here?"

"In general terms," – the onmyouji said, and explained apologetically. – "I never used a spell like this before. But if something goes wrong, I believe, we'll notice right away."

The night was cold, and Subaru breathed on his frozen fingers thoughtfully, trying to focus and get warm at the same time. The next moment he set the ofuda in a form of a pentagram with his usual movement.

"I'll set up a kekkai. It'll protect us at least a little – anything can be in another Tokyo, and I doubt it'll be friendly and harmless," – Subaru put his palms together, and the pentagram lit up with dim light, reminding of that another kekkai Subaru could no longer create.

The city enveloped in darkness was suddenly gone, being replaced by soft cherry blossom petals, which looked so inappropriate here, in the middle of winter and end of the world.

"What is this for?" – Fuuma frowned, uncomprehending, watching how Subaru creates an illusion for the first time. – "Not bad. As good as real," – he observed, catching a few petals, and playing with them in his hands.

"We need to distort the space somehow," – Subaru answered with tension. – "Illusion is the easiest and the best way I know."

"So that means Seishirou left his eye and power to you just in time," – Fuuma mused.

Subaru stopped in surprise, and, after a brief consideration, nodded slowly.

"Right. Without the Sakurazukamori powers this wouldn't work out at all."

"Anything else?"

"Yes, the last," – Subaru carefully pulled out his ritual dagger and held it to his hand. – "We need blood."

"Wait a second, won't mine do?" – there was a genuine offence in Fuuma's voice.

"Um," – Subaru hesitated in confusion. – "No, it'll do, of course. Maybe even better, because the power of Kamui of the Dragons of Earth is greater than mine. What are you doing?"

Fuuma didn't particularly listen to the confused explanations. He grabbed the dagger from Subaru and put it down on his own arm.

"We'll need all your strength. So it's better if I do it," – he chuckled in response to the surprised look from Subaru.

The cut was thin, but that was enough – dark droplets of blood merged together, hastily sliding down to the ground. Subaru forced himself to snap out of a sudden numbness, and silently pointed towards the dark surface. The water was greedily taking in the blood, as if it's only been waiting for this all along.

"I think this should do," – Subaru carefully pulled Fuuma away from the water, handling him a piece of fabric at the same time. – "Can you bandage yourself? I have to start reading the spell immediately, or else it won't work," – he explained in apologetic tone.

"Get on with it already," – Fuuma gave him a little nudge.

Words of the spell sounded stringy, viscous, and melted without a trace in the cold air. The water before the two men was slowly coming to life, dimly illuminating from the inside, sighing and swelling, flooding the surrounding wreckage.

"How did you manage to remember so many words?" – Fuuma couldn't suppress wonder, after the spell was done.

"One has to learn those things by heart – there isn't exactly time during my work to be reading from books," – Subaru shrugged uncertainly, and inhaled deeply. – "So, are you ready?"

"Ready for what? We'll have to dive into this huge puddle? Seriously? But it's so muddy."

Subaru chose to ignore the other man's protests – he couldn't afford to lose even a minute. He gently pulled Fuuma to himself, and the next moment he felt burning icy touch of the cold water. He gasped for air, but the depths were pulling him deeper and deeper below. Subaru involuntarily thought of his dream, and started to think he made a mistake somewhere in the ritual, when all suddenly ended.

The fall was hard, and Subaru coughed, still feeling unpleasant taste of the cold water in his mouth. He stood up carefully, hesitantly looking around, and froze in shock.

What he saw seemed impossible, but, nevertheless, was real.


	11. Chapter 11

**_Disclaimer:_ **I don't own anything, hearts and souls, and characters belong to CLAMP. And this story belongs to my real-life Subaru-kun (**itildin **on LJ), I've just translated in to English.

* * *

><p>"Where the hell are we?" – Fuuma's hoarse voice was coming from behind, and Subaru had to turn around, to face him.<p>

"I'd like to know that," – he muttered, trying to stand up. It was hard – the landing was harsh despite all safety measures and precautions in the spell.

Somehow Subaru managed to get up, leaning onto sharp debris. He stood straight and rubbed his eyes in disbelief.

"No, you aren't hallucinating," – Fuuma commented mockingly, noticing his gesture.

There were wastelands spreading as far as eyes could see all around them. Only shards of buildings – half-destroyed fundaments of houses, dark holes of windows, remnants of walls, fallen roofs – were inclining that people lived here before. Brittle silhouettes were sinking in whitish haze. The two men were standing on top of one of those wrecked houses.

"Is this... Tokyo?" – Subaru was trying to find at least some sign of recognition of the city in the oncoming twilight.

"Well…" – Fuuma silently showed up from behind and pulled Subaru closed to himself, not letting go.

"What are you doing?" – Subaru's surprise was so big he didn't even object to being caught so carelessly.

"You're standing too close to the edge," – Fuuma snorted, letting the onmyouji go, as if nothing happened. He frowned a bit, looking into the distance, and nodded to himself as if he was satisfied with what he saw. – "This truly is Tokyo," – he remarked thoughtfully, and explained, catching Subaru's questioning look. – "It's a bit far from here, but I see the spike of the Tower."

"You have such a good sight?"

"Not really. I just knew what I was looking for," – Fuuma didn't even try to cover self-satisfaction in his tone. – "You did say the remaining barriers were standing in this world as well. Tokyo Tower is noticeable, if for nothing else, then for its height."

"It's good and bad at the same time," – Subaru smiled faintly, surprised by how fast Fuuma got used to the situation they were in.

"Start with the bad," – Fuuma snorted again. He didn't find anything particularly interesting in the surroundings, and was watching at Subaru with anticipation.

"We'll have to reach the Tower somehow to get back to our world. Otherwise spell won't work."

"Just perfect," – Fuuma deliberately rolled his eyes. – "Your Seishirou knows just fine how to pick a good route for an afternoon walk," – he came to the edge of debris, dangerously hanging above the ground. – "There is nothing but marshes here."

"It's my fault, not Seishirou's," – Subaru sighed, turning away. – "I must've done something wrong in the spell, that's why we are so far from the initial place," – he explained guiltily.

"It's weird enough it worked in the first place," – Fuuma smirked and continued with curiosity. – "So what's the good news then?"

"The fact we at least found the Tower."

"Can't argue with that. Well then, I suggest we stay here in this, er, house for the night. I don't really want to go through the marshes during the dark," – Fuuma deftly grabbed the edge of the destroyed building, and carefully descended into the window opening, showered with concrete crumbs. – "Come here," – he called Subaru. – "There's a whole room at our service."

"Room" was certainly an exaggeration – dusty walls, snake-like cracks all over the floor, and a complete lack of any furniture or even its remnants.

"I'm not sleepy," – Subaru, without removing his coat, nestled in the corner. – "So rest for now, and I'll keep watch."

Night's air was satiated with moisture and smell of the mire. It slowly crept into the room, gradually flooding it with chill. Subaru tiredly looked into the starless cloudy sky, trying to cast away his worries for the time being. He wasn't quite successful with it. The unknown world, spread over half-destroyed walls, was sighing with strange muffled rustles, rustling of the leaves and faint breeze. Somewhere away, on the edge of hearing range, water was splashing and some bird was hooting.

"Nope, can't sleep," – after tossing and turning for about half an hour on the cold rough floor, Fuuma stood up unwillingly, and stretching up, went to Subaru. – "You sure you will stay up all night? You can go to sleep, I'll wake you up if something happens," – Fuuma sat next to the onmyouji.

"What do you think happened in this world?" – it seemed like Subaru didn't hear the previous question.

"Dragons of Earth won," – Fuuma smirked, but then suddenly got serious. – "I don't know. But it doesn't look like anybody survived," – he fell quiet for a while, staring wearily into the darkness, then added casually. – "By the way, my power doesn't work here. What about you?"

Subaru touched the ofuda lightly, in the pocket of his coat, and shook his head.

"Same as usual."

Fuuma raised his eyebrows in surprise, but said nothing.

* * *

><p>Morning greeted them with a light drizzle and sullen sky, hanging low above the two men.<p>

Subaru struggled to sit up, yawning and trying to wake up fully – he dozed off somewhere in the middle of the night, and now felt rather drowsy. His cloak became wet, completely drenched with moisture, strands of his hair stuck to his face.

"Finally," – Fuuma cheerfully reacted to his awakening, and Subaru wondered silently, where he gets all that energy from. – "Tea, coffee, breakfast in bed?"

Subaru ironically raised his brow, remaining quiet.

At the word "breakfast" he remembered they haven't eaten since yesterday, but he wasn't really hungry. Perhaps it was the effect of his lifestyle in the normal Tokyo – he often forgot to eat there. For the first time his not really useful habit came in handy.

"We have to go," – Subaru peered into the window anxiously, estimating distance to the ground. Fog cleared out a bit, and now, in the dim light of the day, he could see a little more. However, the sight wasn't comforting – solid overgrown swamp for many miles ahead. And somewhere at the very limit of visibility, the sharp spike of the Tower, cutting through the gloomy sky.

Subaru carefully jumped down, trying not to make a noise – after all, it was unknown, was this world as deserted as it looked like at the first glance. Fuuma followed.

"Yeah, not really like the picture I had in mind, while imagining my walk through the countryside with you," – he deliberately sighed heavily, and without hesitation, stepped forward.

Moving through the damp and slippery soil, that was as if trying on purpose to disappear from beneath their feet, was extremely difficult and tiring. They tried to keep close to the fragments of bricks and concrete plates, that were sticking forlornly from the murky water and mud, pointing to more solid and dry patches of the land. Faint drizzle didn't stop, and gusts of wind were throwing its cold drops right in their faces, along with the musty smell of the swamp. Some plants, similar to huge reeds, rustled in displeasure, reaching forward with their faded leaves.

"Won't we get lost?" – Subaru asked worriedly. – "From here, from the lowlands, we cannot see the Tower at all," – he looked around uncertainly, trying to find at least some landmark.

"No, we need to get there first," – Fuuma cheerfully waved his hand towards the next ruined building, settled in the swamp. – "From there, we'll take a look around and see how much we wandered off our initial course."

Subaru nodded silently, and wrapped tighter in his rain-drenched coat. That didn't help him to get warmer, but there wasn't much of a choice. Difficulty of moving forward was increasing with each step. Moreover, Subaru felt some growing anxiety. Several times he thought he heard somebody was following them – faint lapping of the water, crunch of a broken branch, strange rustles. He stopped and listened, but from all the sounds he could only distinguish the rain.

"What is it?" – Fuuma turned around, wondering, and frowned, seeing Subaru fell behind.

"I thought I heard…" – Subaru didn't have time to finish his thought.

A strange creature – covered in skin, eyeless, but with sharp teeth, resembling a snake or a worm, but at the same time unlike any, emerged from the depths of the thick swamp water.

"Fuuma!" – in the very last moment Subaru managed to push the other man aside.

The next second Subaru felt those unbearably sharp teeth of the ugly creature digging into his side like blades. Slippery body pounced from the top, as if trying to bury the onmyouji in the dank mud.

"_Right, Fuuma's power doesn't work here,"_ – Subaru remembered, though too late, struggling to reach for his ofuda. His head was dizzy, his vision blurry, his coat instantly became soaked with the blood from his wound. His hands were trembling and disobeying, yet somehow he managed to grab the right ofuda and whisper few words with an effort.

And then, the horizon rolled over, and the surrounding world was plunged into the darkness.


	12. Chapter 12

**_Disclaimer:_ **I don't own anything, hearts and souls, and characters belong to CLAMP. And this story belongs to my real-life Subaru-kun (itildin on LJ), I've just translated it to English.

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><p>Somebody's voice was persistently calling his name.<p>

Subaru tried to open his eyes, and see, who was it who needed him so badly, but his eyelids seemed to be too heavy, and his body refused to listen to him. Subaru's consciousness was in mess, some blurry forms and pictures were coming to mind, and his head wasn't going to clear up.

It hurts, it's hot.

"_What happened to me?"_ – Subaru was feeling like he's drifting through the sticky fog, which he couldn't shake off. Shortly after, another sensation came through, way more sharp and uncomfortable than others. Pain – at first weak and distant – gradually grew more and more intense, and in some moment became so unbearable that Subaru was practically thrown into reality.

"Finally, you're awake," – there was a great relief in Fuuma's voice. His eyes were full of worry though.

Subaru moved carefully, trying to get Fuuma's hands off his shoulders, and was surprised to find he is lying on the ground for some reason. Muddy swamp water, dully-colored leaves of plants, the rustling rain – everything remained the same. Subaru was struggling to focus his vision properly, but he couldn't fail to notice motionless slimy shapeless heap – the strange creature that attacked them.

"_Looks like I made it in time after all,"_ – Subaru thought with satisfaction, and then asked out loud:

"What was it?" – his voice was hoarse and he grew more thirsty with each minute. Subaru mechanically touched his side with his palm, where the monster bit him. Blood. Thick, dark. Disgustingly sticky.

"I don't know. It appears that, in the absence of people, some strange things grew to exist here," – Fuuma allowed himself to smirk, and then continued in a serious tone. – "Thanks. If it wasn't for you…" – he broke off and resolutely pulled Subaru's coat aside. – "We need to examine your wound."

As soon as Fuuma finished unbuttoning it, Subaru's cloak, completely drenched, fell on both sides, spreading like ink stains over the ground.

"Damn," – Fuuma swore, lifting the edge of Subaru's turtleneck that stuck to onmyouji's body.

The wound looked really bad. Fuuma could see that, even without being an expert in such things. Ragged edges of the cut, and continuous bleeding. Subaru gritted his teeth, holding back an involuntary groan, when Fuuma's fingers returned turtleneck's fabric back into place.

"Ok, we will do this," – Fuuma frowned, focusing, and then lifted Subaru in his arms lightly. – "The next building is close enough. We'll get there, and I'll try to bandage your wound somehow. Then we'll see," – he tried to make his voice sound soothing and confident, even though what was happening to them, seemed like a bad dream.

"You don't have to, I'll get there myself," – Subaru tried to protest weakly, but Fuuma wasn't even listening to him.

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><p>Almost sunken into a viscous swamp water ruins, that once were brick house, approached painfully slow. When Fuuma finally stepped into half-destroyed doorway, Subaru exhaled sharply, not hiding relief.<p>

Trying to avoid too hasty and rough movements, Fuuma carefully lowered Subaru onto the floor, and, after a brief consideration, took off and spread his coat over the ground – wet, mired in the mud – still it was better than nothing.

"I'll be right back," – he smiled to Subaru, encouraging, but it didn't really look natural. – "I'll try to find at least some water to clear the wound," – he explained, seeing onmyouji's puzzled look.

"_Yeah, sure, go ahead, I'll wait,"_ – was going to say Subaru, but words didn't came out, dying somewhere inside his burning with thirst throat. He closed his eyes tiredly, hoping Fuuma will understand the gesture correctly.

To Subaru it seemed that only few seconds passed, when Fuuma again appeared in the ruined room, holding some sort of badly damaged plastic bottle in his hands. It was still able to hold the water though.

"The clearest one that I could find," – Fuuma nodded towards the bottle. – "I got lucky, there's a lake nearby. It's almost dried out and grown with plants, but it'll do," – he reached for Subaru and halted with surprise, when onmyouji's fingers weakly entwined around his wrist, stopping further movement.

"It's okay," – Subaru exhaled with an effort. The serious look in his differently-colored eyes was telling the decision was already made. – "Leave me here and go. I'll tell you what to do, so you can return to your Tokyo, don't worry," – he added softly, noticing, and understanding in a wrong way an angry expression of the other man.

"Enough bullshit," – Fuuma reacted unexpectedly rough. – "I understand you can't wait to reunite with your precious Seishirou," – he lifted Subaru by his chin and finished his thought with an unpleasant smirk. – "But I'm afraid you'll have to wait a bit longer."

"But, listen," – each word was more difficult for Subaru, he was halting, taking ragged gasps. – "You have better chances to get out of here on your own."

"Since when are you worrying about me this much," – Fuuma snorted, and no longer paying attention to the other man's protests, began to carefully wash Subaru's wound. Water was instantly colored in crimson, leaving pale streaks over the floor. Pain, that was dulled until now, exploded with a new strength, and Subaru bit his lip, suppressing a scream.

"_I won't make it to the Tower, we're wasting our time in vain,"_ – tired and tortured thought slid somewhere at the edge of his consciousness. The surroundings were growing dull and blur, and Subaru forced himself to stay awake with his will.

"Here, way better," – Fuuma threw the empty bottle aside, looking satisfied, and pulled the edge of his T-shirt. Sound of tearing fabric was heard, and after a few moments, Fuuma touched Subaru's wound with a soft, slightly damp cloth. – "Done," – he concluded, finishing his work.

"Thank you," – Subaru tried to smile in appreciation, but the smile came pathetic and tortured. He desperately wanted to drink and sleep, but didn't ask for water, not willing to create more difficulties for Fuuma, and there was no time to sleep.

"How do you feel?" – this time Fuuma failed to hide the alarm in his voice.

"Well…" – Subaru waived off his hand uncertainly.

"Understood," – Fuuma's frown grew darker. He carefully wrapped Subaru in his own coat, and lifted him in his arms again. – "We have to hurry," – he gazed at the barely seen silhouettes of concrete pieces and corroded constructions, somewhere far ahead. – "We won't be able to reach the Tower today, so we'll have to take a shelter in those ruins over there," – he pointed to the right and forward with his gaze, and asked in a serious tone. – "If it gets worse – tell me."

Subaru didn't have strength to answer; he leaned closer to Fuuma, finally allowing himself to close his eyes. Apparently, he drifted away somewhere along the road – Fuuma's confident step was calming, and made Subaru drowsy. The sleep didn't bring rest the onmyouji longer for – Subaru became stuffy, despite the wet clothes, and fever enveloped his body. His thoughts were hazy and confused, he seemed to hear strange rustles and sighs, as if somebody or something was watching them again, hiding in dense overgrown marsh.

"You're burning up," – Fuuma stopped abruptly and peered inquisitively into Subaru's eyes.

"It's alright," – the onmyouji wearily rubbed his face, throwing dark sticking strands of his hair aside. – "Just…" – he hesitated, unable to coherently express his thought. – "Nobody is following us, right? I mean… that thing…" – long sentences were hard for him to say, and Subaru paused, swallowing hard.

Fuuma instantly grew wary, and stepped into the shadow of the reeds, trying to catch the echoes of another's presence.

"It's quiet for the time being," – he whispered, easily jumped over the especially boggy piece of land, and continued his way. But now Fuuma was alert, and more than once he froze and listened to attentively – the least he wanted to meet such a creature again.

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><p>Dull grey sky turned blue with the oncoming twilight, when they reached the next ruins, both exhausted to the limit.<p>

Fuuma just started to lower the onmyouji to the cracked floor, when reality suddenly disappeared, flooded with darkness, and Subaru felt like he's falling, falling, falling… It ended as suddenly, as it began. Somebody caught him, stopping the fall, and when he opened his eyes, he saw Seishirou.

"Seishirou," – Subaru was so surprised he forgot to add the usual "-san" to the name. Subaru listened to his own feelings and frowned in confusion – the wound no longer hurt. He lifted the edge of his turtleneck and realized there was nothing to hurt – the wound disappeared, along with fever, weakness and sleepiness. – "I must be drowsing again," – Subaru sighed.

"Not exactly," – it was impossible to distinguish any emotion in Seishirou's tone, as usual, and it was a mystery for Subaru, how the man truly feels, seeing what is happening.

"Seishirou-san, why did you stage all this," – Subaru asked with reprimand, trying to free himself from the other's arms. – "I'm not even sure we will make it back to the other Tokyo."

"You wanted hints, didn't you," – Seishirou appeared to be amused by the current situation. – "You got them," – he wasn't in hurry to let Subaru go from his arms.

"Well, yes," – the onmyouji sighed, resurrecting an image of empty and destroyed Tokyo in his mind. – "So our world will become like this too, no matter who wins? Since the future already came to be."

"Right," – Seishirou was looking thoughtfully at something visible to him only. He finally let go of Subaru, and onmyouji looked around, settling himself over some wreckage. – "If Dragons of Earth win, the world will turn into this by itself, and if Dragons of Heaven win, people will make the Earth like this eventually. The outcome will be the same in any case, and you've seen it."

"Can it be fixed somehow?" – Subaru shivered and put his hands into his pockets – be it dream or whatever, but the wind was piercing here, same as in the reality.

"_Next time I'll be about to lose consciousness, I'll try to imagine sea coast and some beach with shelves and cocktails,"_ – the onmyouji thought skeptically, trying to get warm in icy gusts of the wind to no avail.

"Of course, it can be. But I won't tell you how exactly," – Seishirou made Subaru happy once again.

"I'll have to dig through all the bookshelves again?" – Subaru arched his eyebrow questioningly. To sit on nonexistent shards away from space and time, and talk to Seishirou was pleasant against all the common sense.

"They don't write things like these in books," – Seishirou said sarcastically, and turned to Subaru, watching him attentively. – "I guess I should give you a hint after all," – he decided in the end. – "Any preordained future will come, if the choice is made. Then again, it is not necessary to make a choice in the first place."

"It's not any clearer to me," – Subaru caught Seishirou's gaze upon him, and smiled hesitantly. – "Then again, I don't think I'll be the one to muse about this puzzle," – he pressed his palm over his wound, invisible in this place, and for a moment he thought he felt the hot stickiness of the blood under his fingers.

"Don't be silly," – Seishirou snapped.

"Fuuma said the same."

After mentioning of Fuuma's name, Seishirou smirked somewhat strange, but then said seriously:

"You have to go back. You've been unconscious for too long."

Subaru was going to object that being in this unreality together with Seishirou is a lot more pleasant, than walking through marshes with a painful wound on his side, but the man was faster.

"I'll see you around yet," – Seishirou touched Subaru's cheek lightly, stroking it down from the top with his fingers, and then reality disappeared in the dark once more.


End file.
